Attachment and the Fear of Loss

Another type of Manipulation in Romantic Relationships is one that Preys on a Person`s Fear of Loss and Sense of Attachment or Addiction to the Manipulator. This can be one of the most effective when it comes to Long-Term Manipulation because of the strength of the Target`s Fear and Aversion to loss or doing anything to Jeopardize Losing Possession.

Many People don`t think of themselves as being Addicted to Possessions, but the Truth is that when a person develops a Relationship with another Human Being, part of that presence is a formed attachment that receives reinforcement the longer he/she stays with that Partner.

Love can be gained and Lost overtime, but the attachment and habitual presence of a Partner can be something that is very hard to overcome, and this is what makes the loss of a loved one or partner so difficult to manage, even if there has been an estrangement in Terms of Romantic Love or Affection.

A lot of Success in this Particular Tactic Depends on the Nature and Personality of the Victim. This is why choosing a victim who is Susceptible to being controlled and manipulated in this way is an important first step should the manipulator have the opportunity to choose.

Alternatively, this type of Manipulation might Manifest Later on as changes take place in the Relationship and the More Dominant Partner Decides to take advantage of this Trait in order to maintain control or Gain access to some different type of Reward.

Once this vulnerability is known to the abuser, it is just a matter of time before he can enact control over the target using threats such as Abruptly leaving the victim and arousing the fear of abandonment. The user may threaten to divorce the subject or leave him/her for another partner, or the abuser play around with these kinds of threats by talking about how desirable another person is, how he/she might like to be with that person if they weren`t with the target to doubt more and more her own capability of staying in a relationship and “keeping” a man at her side.

This will build toward the degradation of self-confidence and identity, playing into a whole new level of emotional manipulation as described in the previous sections.

The tactic of pulling away, stringing along behind, then rewarding with a brief return is one way to put Tactic into Hyperdrive. That period of alone time without the Partner can often work to inflame that sense of Fear and Anxiety about the Loss so that when the Partner does Finally throw the Target a Bone, she Responds with desperation and a willingness to go along with anything the partner wants in order to get him back into her Life.

All three of these Manipulation tactics used within Relationships can be Effective alone or Together as a combination of Tactics. The Decision Regarding the Tactic being used is often dictated by how much the Target begins to show her colors regarding her own emotional vulnerabilities. The abuser who chooses to pay attention to these signals and then exploits those areas of vulnerability is a malicious type of an abuser who has chosen to put his own Emotional needs and desires ahead of that of the partner or target he has chosen.

Sometimes, this switch to an abusive spouse happens down the road, following a traumatic event, and sometimes, this is something the road, following a traumatic event, and sometimes, this is something the abuser will go to Great lengths to hide until he is married and feels secure in his position of Power and Dominance over the Partner.

Other times, the Manipulator has been an abuser his whole Life, being in this particular field and has possibly put a lot of thought and Preparation into his choice of Partner and how he will enact his manipulation Tactics and Control after the Relationship has been established under false pretenses.

Just as a mother of a son who becomes a violent criminal cannot often completely lose the love and attachment for her child, the Partner of an abusive partner may find it incredibly difficult to tear herself away from the situation when she has grown to Truly Love the abuser and has formed a strong bond and sense of attachment to him.

as mentioned before, the additional factors involved, such as children, can work against the victim to keep her locked in a situation. This makes her feel trapped and as though she cannot go to anyone else for help, whether she`s been threatened directly by the abuser or these fears are only in her head.So, we have Discussed quite a bit about Manipulating Partners, in next Chapter we will Discuss:

” Acceptable Influence vs Toxic Manipulation ” 

One of the most Malicious and Harmful  Forms of Manipulation happens in the place that most of us believe is the most comfortable and safest to spend our time – Inside your Home.

But the Truth is, people live out years and even decades of their lives under the influence of a Manipulative Partner. We Read stories and headlines all the time about the Manipulation that can happen inside the home and how sometimes it can Lead to Physical Altercations, Abuse, and even Spousal Homicide.

The Manipulation that occurs inside the home between partners employ the most powerful and Influential Forms of Emotional Manipulation in Existence, and it works on a scale that Tampers with the very souls and hearts of the Targets.

When a form of Manipulation by a Partner is very successful, it is because the Manipulator has been able to pinpoint exactly where the partner is most vulnerable emotionally. This area of vulnerability will be different in each person, and, certainly, there are those who are much more manipulatable than others of a stronger constitution and higher emotional intelligence. We will focus on some of the most common emotional strategies employed by manipulators in the home.

Flattery and Superficial Charm

Superficial Relationships employ Superficial Pleasures and Techniques. these are the kinds of Relationships that Might start through an Initial Sexual Encounter and sustain themselves based purely on the initial excitement and pleasure coming from an exciting new affair, extra-martial or otherwise Predators in this Arena often juggle multiple partners at the same time and become quite talented at compartmentalizing each interaction and keeping them separate from each other.

This is vital to a successful Manipulative Tactic in this context because he, most often, will employ excessive charm and flattery in order to put the target in a place psychologically where she is most susceptible.

 as with all of the most skilled dark psychology users, the practitioner will have picked out his target specific to his intentions and tactics. Those women who spend all of their Time on their Looks and Making themselves Public on Social Media are often the most susceptible to flattery and superficial charm Tactics.

They enjoy the Attention and Compliments, and they often form a kind of addiction to this attention, using it as a way to sustain themselves and their self-esteem. When they don`t get this attention their esteem and confidence might plummet to a place where they become desperate, often utilizing sexual influence in order to garner the attention and admiration they`ve develop such a need for.

This type of Tactic can be quite economical for the manipulation are effective for short-term gain, but the effects of this behavior often catch up to the manipulator in some way or another. The targets of such manipulation are also susceptible to being stolen away, as the emotional attachment present in deeper types of emotional manipulation does not take hold in the same way regarding this superficial charm-based manipulation.

Anyone who comes along with more material wealth and steady use of charm and flattery may ignite a desire to switch gears, stemming from a mentality that the “Grass may be Greener on the other side “.

Without the bond of love or trust holding her back, this might be an easy choice to take. When this situation arises, it is common for the manipulator to act out in the way of violent or abusive behavior in order to keep his target “in-line“.  

Jealousy and the need for control and dominance often accompany the desire to gather “Trophies” through superficial Manipulation, and the Prize of maintaining control over his Prey is not Grounded in a Deep, Fulfilling Relationships, But Rather the Status that comes along with “Owning” a woman.

Women are just as capable of stringing along a man, perhaps through a much more powerful persuasion tactic and desire. Those men who are obviously drawn to and dominated by the pursuit of women are easy targets for predatory women of this type.

It is easy to pick out these types of men in a crowd or to simply attract them through Flirtation. Men can be Susceptible to letting down their guards emotionally when they choose Relationship. In order to support these desires and fool themselves into thinking they are being fulfilled on a deeper level, they can buy in all sorts of Psychological Manipulation Techniques, which work to convince the target that there are Real Love and Respect within the Relationship.

Women who are skilled in this type of manipulation will be quite insidious in their mixture of Tactics, Turning the Tables and inciting guilt when they see the opportunity to make their target feel bad for something they did. They can ignite their Partner`s Sense of Protecting what`s theirs and even encourage the partner to act unethically on the Predator`s Behalf, all in the name of false Claim of Love.

So, In next Part of this chapter we will Discuss the Topic

 “Gradual Emotional Breakdown“.